February 2012
1 tag
I want to put deodorant on one arm and not the other just to see what it would feel like
Feb 10th
i don’t understand the point of getting so worked up about internet companies (social networks) gathering your data to provide you with a personalized experience yes, i’m saying that i really don’t care if they are “violating my privacy”, because it’s sort of the agreement i make when i get on the internet in the first place it’s not invasive, regardless...
Feb 9th
1 note
Feb 8th
If my penis could fit through your stupid ass gauges/plugs/mutilated earlobes then I think it’s time to sew those fuckers up…you went too big sorry you lose try again
Feb 8th
3 notes
Feb 7th
1 note
5 tags
The whole “fair and square” campaign that JC Penney is doing is really appealing and simple, if you are only judging by the ads and the new February catalog, both of which are really well designed and fun to watch/look at If you’re judging by walking into a JC Penney now, though, you’ll be walking into the same old “upscale Marshalls” that you’d expect...
Feb 4th
i just remembered when that “slap dick on keyboard, post results” thing was being reblogged somebody typed up the first page of twilight o m g that day i almost peed myself and i still find it just as funny
Feb 3rd
1 note
when your computer asks if you want to install 3 updates and restart your computer as you’re restarting the computer to complete the installation of 3 updates……….i think I am entering update limbo sweet Jesus I can’t handle this abort mission please PLeASE STOP I AM MELTING GOD
Feb 2nd
1 note
reptarcereal: the condoms are glow-in-the-dark and the directions on the back say “expose to light for 30 seconds, then rise and shine!” sorry but i won’t really be inclined to delay sex just so i can see a glowing green phallus in the shadow of nightfall there’s really no entertainment value there, i don’t understand the appeal
Feb 2nd
16 notes
so at the dentist when she was spraying my teeth with that water gun thing they use she sprayed my lip and omfg she grabbed some gauze and patted it away so awkwardly that I just started laughing so hard with that thing still in my mouth and water was going everywhere ok it was funnier at the time
Feb 1st
3 notes
Feb 1st
reptarcereal: if you google “micropenis” a picture of demi lovato shows up
Feb 1st
4 notes
January 2012
Jan 26th
so on my test they thought i put “scpeamsicle” instead of “screamsicle” @gmail so now any email from them goes to scpeamsicle that makes me so angry
Jan 26th
1 note
this is the first time i have been on my computer in a while and i mean like it’s probably been a few weeks damn
Jan 25th
Jan 25th
Jan 22nd
29,281 notes
when the only people you can sing “what I got” with are from saints row
Jan 22nd
Jan 21st
41,287 notes
Jan 20th
45 notes
Jan 19th
8,545 notes
that part in Titanic when the ship designer guy fixes the clock as the ship is sinking is probably the saddest thing in the world I don’t even know why but that is what gets me in this movie
Jan 14th
3 notes
MOLLY LEGROW IS MY LIFEEEEE GAHHH I DO NOTHING BUT THINK OF HER HELLLLPPP
Jan 13th
1 note
American horror story is never going to last I mean you can’t replace an entire cast every single fucking season especially when the first season they were all really good characters
Jan 13th
1 note
Jan 9th
Tumblr: your premiere child pornography destination
Jan 8th
6 tags
Jan 8th
1 note
I always get jealous of people that can pee for like three minutes straight
Jan 7th
Jan 6th
Jan 6th
1,778 notes
Jan 6th
941 notes
6 tags
what the hell is this “fan mail” thing i am looking at help me david karp karper karpaccio karpets karpool karpology karponia karpal karp karp
Jan 5th
7 tags
Jan 5th
3 notes
Jan 3rd
Jan 2nd
954 notes
Portlandia is probably the best show ever invented
Jan 2nd
December 2011
we just upgraded our modem finally oh my jesus christ this internet is fast fast fastsaddfgsda
Dec 31st
Dec 29th
1 tag
Dec 29th
1 note
lol the people that hope the new year will be better than 2011 seriously that sounds like it’s your problem, not the world’s problem
Dec 27th
Dec 22nd
Dec 22nd
107 notes
Dec 21st
4 notes
Dec 20th
1 note
Dec 19th
3 notes
Dec 19th
4 notes
Dec 18th
56,503 notes
OH MY GOD SNOW
Dec 18th
Dec 18th
2 notes
Dec 18th